I watched the stars
I think I'm just done living, I said. Not in a bad way though.
Well what's a good way? asked Nathan. He kinda chuckled lightly in a way that was soothing. I felt warmth emanating from his person.
Well how are you so chipper all the time? I asked. You don't seem down or gloomy.
We walked down the red carpeted hallway to an intersection at the... Hadn't we been in a hotel?
I was in a planetarium. And Nathan was sitting next to me looking up as if nothing had happened.
What the fuck? I said, frozen.
Stay with it, he commanded. Don't acknowledge it. Talk to me. Keep talking. You were talking about being done living.
Right right, I said, brushing sweaty palms on my pants. I-I'm actually good.
Oh yeah? Why the sudden change of heart? Nathan's tone sounded accusing. That put me back in the present and I stared up at the ceiling as the Planetarium guide zoomed in on a star cluster.
So those are not stars, the guide was saying. Those are actually entire galaxies.
I marveled at the striation of colors sitting between the stars like couches.
I like this, I said to Nathan.
You're in it now, said Nathan with a grin.
I wasn't convinced of his mood now that I'd seen another side of him. But I kept going with it.
You see? said Nathan. Now you're living again.
But what is causing all of this? Where are we?
I felt a thunderous motion shake my seat.
Relax, said Nathan, squirming and tensing up. Fucking relax.
I took a deep breath. Okay okay, I said. And watched the stars.

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